I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.