ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
There's lube on my homework. #priorities