I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
