Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
