I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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