I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
a search helicopter?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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