can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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