So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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