Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
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i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
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I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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