I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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