Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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