he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
