what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
