I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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