I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize