She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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