I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
