like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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She's not a foreskin expert like you
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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