he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
