Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
