She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
