he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
