Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire