I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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