he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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