i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
