In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize
