The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Are my feet made of real feet?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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