im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
