I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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