everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
