At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize