it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
