This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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