you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
soo... how was my night?
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