i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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