I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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