He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
