worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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