new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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