North Korea, Best Korea!
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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