can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
