Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
