The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Only a mothe r could love this liver
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
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