Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
did i walk over a car last night?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize