where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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