Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
