the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Less talking, more tequila
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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