the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
