You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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