why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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