No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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